Gratitude: A life changing tool available to all
Forty years in this profession has taught me that one of the most powerful, transformative tools we have available to us, if we choose it, is gratitude. It is an unlimited resource and requires nothing but intentionality to access. First let’s define what gratitude is in the context of this reflection. There are many definitions that emerge from scientific research and psychological, religious and spiritual perspectives.
For the sake of this reflection, gratitude can be described as a feeling of thankfulness and/or appreciation for something noticed and experienced in one’s present moment awareness of living their life. Gratitude, as both a state and a trait, can be developed for our benefit.
When one sets the intention to notice moments where they are feeling gratitude they are engaging in a process called brain priming. Brain priming is activating a part of the brain so one is more likely to notice something in their present moment awareness. A helpful way to start a brain priming process for gratitude is to decide to keep a gratitude journal. Curious about how to make this happen?
Start by defining the experiment. Answer these few questions to make your practice practical. How many gratitude moments do you want to log a day? How will you keep your log? How long will you commit to running this experiment before you reflect on what you have learned by conducting this exercise?
It may be counter-intuitive but some of the most impactful gratitude moments are simply that - a moment! The thinner one slices time and the more the senses are involved the better. Example: If you choose to be grateful for the fact you have a home to live in, after the third or fourth time of using that it gets more theoretical than real. If one breaks it down into an experience like, “I am grateful for the spot I sit in while having my morning coffee. It’s a comfortable chair and I can look out the window at the birds on the bird feeder. It lifts my spirits”. Or better yet, “I am grateful for the first wash of coffee over my tongue in the morning and I am grateful for the brilliant red of that cardinal”. Noticing small experiences will be more effective at shifting from a feeling of gratitude to a mood of gratitude.
A momentary feeling of gratitude leading to a mood of gratitude is where the power of gratitude on your general state or well-being happens. Depressive and anxious thoughts essentially brain primes one to look and find what is negative or going wrong in life. This supports and grows the depressive and/or anxious mood. We can choose what we will focus on and it can make all the difference.
Our brains are amazing organs capable of many impressive feats but a brain cannot be in two contradictory moods at the same time. Every time a moment is identified that is generated by a feeling and then perhaps a mood of gratitude, it enters your head space. It can switch very quickly back to a negative mood but something that can be interrupted does not have as much power over us as something that cannot be interrupted. In addition, the act of setting an intention of noticing moments one is grateful for leads to identifying many more positive moments in the process of picking the three that will make it into the journal. This in turn establishes gratitude as more prominent in your experience and can build gratitude to becoming a trait or way of being in the world.
In addition to displacing negativity and discouragement, cultivating gratitude can open us up to a wider range of experiences. Lakota author and activist Doug Good Feather is committed to sharing Indigenous wisdom and practices and writes, “no matter what our circumstances, gratitude is available to us: Each and every morning offers us a chance to start anew, fresh, and to begin again. Each morning when we wake—should we choose to listen—is a message from the Creator to remember the privilege we were given of waking up.” He also states that the indigenous perspective is that gratitude and generosity go hand in hand. “Gratitude is an internal characteristic and generosity is our external expression of our sense of gratitude. Basically, gratitude is how we feel, and generosity is how we express that feeling out in the world.
Cultivating and growing our gratitude can transform us and can transform those around us through the generosity that inevitably flows from a grateful heart. So…what are you waiting for?”